Leadership and “Love-ship”
To those of us who are managers in organizations, to those who report to us we are the most important leaders in the organization. We are more likely to influence their desire to stay or leave, their career path, ethical behavior, ability to perform well, drive to “wow” customers, job satisfaction and motivation to share the organization’s vision and values.
Is it also true in the new corporate world of dual, triple, quadruple, or even no reporting lines?
Absolutely!
We “give” leadership like we “give” a gift. We have the most influence on the work life of people who are the closest to us. Leadership is not about position or title. Leadership is about relationships, credibility and behavior.
U.S Army Major General John H. Stanford survived the Korean and Vietnam War. He was highly decorated. The loyalty of his troops was extraordinary. Stanford later headed the Military Traffic Command for the U.S. Army during the Persian Gulf War. When he retired from the Army, he became the manager of Fulton County, GA., when Atlanta was hosting the 1996 Summer Olympics. Then, he became the superintendent of the Seattle Public Schools, where he made a big difference in public education.
When asked about how he went about developing leaders, whether in schools, the military and government, he replied:
“When anyone asks me that question, I tell them I have the secret to success in life. The secret to success is to stay in love. Staying in love gives you the fire to ignite other people. A person who is not in love doesn’t really feel the kind of excitement that helps them to get ahead and lead others and to achieve. I don’t know any other fire, any other thing in life that is more exhilarating and is more positive a feeling than love is.”
Leadership is not an affair of the head. Leadership is an affair of the heart.
We work quite intensely and for long hours in order to do our best in high-performing organizations. We put in long hours, but it doesn’t mean we can’t enjoy ourselves. To persist for months and years at a demanding pace, we need the emotional fuel to replenish our spirits. We need the will to continue and the courage to do things we have never done before.
How can we encourage people’s hearts? How can others encourage our hearts? How can we create a “love-ship” in our organization?
Recognizing individual contributions, good results, positive performance, special attributes, and virtues shown on the job is a great start. By putting these essentials into practice, we stimulate the internal drive within each individual and feed their spirit.
It’s similar to parenting. There are too kind of parents. The first kind mostly reprimands their kids for doing things wrong. The second kind mostly rewards their kids for doing things right.
It is the same with leaders. We want to be “hunters” of good behaviors; constantly looking for “people doing things right”, telling them to “keep up the good job” and most importantly, showing appreciation publicly.
Leadership is a “love-ship”… a hunt to find and appreciate good behaviors, achievements, attitudes and values in everyone we work with.
How Bad is “Business As Usual”?
Leadership is a choice! Leadership doesn’t come from titles, positions or genetics. Leaders choose to play the game, take a risk, act bold, assume responsibility and live life of passion and excitement.
The moment we realize that our leadership is a result of choices and not conditions, the effect is utterly transformational. We become more accountable and involved in closing the gap between the corporate culture we envision and the one that we currently have.
“Business as usual” is a death sentence for a business. We are living in exponential times. The top 10 in-demand jobs in 2010 did not exist in 2004. If Facebook were a country, it would be the third largest in the world after China and India. The first text message was sent in December 1992. Today, the number of texts messages sent and received everyday exceeds the total population of the planet. It took 38 years to reach a market audience of 50 million through radio…13 years through TV…4 years through internet…3 years through iPod…2 years through Facebook. The amount of technical information is doubling every 2 years. 1 in 8 couples married in the U.S. in 2006 met online (including me…). The world is changing more rapidly than any time before and it looks like the pace of change is getting faster and faster.
This is a wake-up call for every person who wants to make a difference. To be a successful business leader in the new world means to believe in changing the cultural DNA of any organization which is doing “business as usual”. So what does it take to make a difference?
Be a Player
There are two kinds of participants in the new game – Players and Bystanders. The players are actively engaged in winning the game. Players bring their heart and soul to the game. They bring energy and passion to the rest of the team. They want to make a difference. Players choose to “be there”. We can count on them to bring their whole self to the game.
When the game gets tougher, we find more bystanders and fewer players. The bystanders are afraid of getting hurt. Can we really be players if we are afraid of pain? Are there any professional football players who become stars by being afraid of getting hurt? So must leaders not be afraid. We take risks to be players. Sometimes we win. Sometimes we feel the pain of failure.
Take Risks
CEOs rarely complain about people who take too many risks. We have yet to hear them complain about folks pushing new initiatives, new products, new services and new revenue streams. CEOs gripe mostly about people who play it safe and avoid taking risks.
Leaders step through the door of uncertainty to seize an opportunity. Right? Our ability to change the rules of the game is what makes the difference. This is what makes us extremely valuable. Whether it is product innovations, new strategies, advanced business systems or partnership suggestions, we can’t innovate without experimenting. We can’t experiment without making mistakes. We can’t make mistakes unless we are willing to risk failure, sometimes costly and painful.
Do we have the courage to challenge the status quo, especially if our bosses are the ones promoting the status quo? Do we have the guts to fight the bureaucracy and go beyond the boundaries of our job description?
We all face almost the same fears. Nobody is exempt. It is the ability to walk through the fear that makes the difference. Fear leads us into smaller lives. In fear we procrastinate, rationalize, paralyze, hesitate, make excuses, and ultimately end up living less fulfilling lives.
It is our own choice how we handle fear. We can feel the fear and do it anyway, or we can give in to it stop taking risks. When we walk through it, fear loses its hold. If we run from it, fear gains power over us. The more we walk through our fears, the more courageous we become. We become brave. We risk more. We gain self-esteem.
Making passion bigger than fear paves the way to take more risks. When we strongly believe in the significance of the outcome, when it makes a difference, when we can shout a big YES, we win over our fears.
Focus Forward
Our attitudes and motivation in the present are shaped by our view of the future. Our future isn’t in the rearview mirror. Therefore, what we have done previously has nothing to do with how we are currently perceived by our peers and bosses.
Focusing forward is about elevating hope instead of thinking about past defeats.
Focusing forward enables us to change from what we have been into what we really want to accomplish.
Focusing forward is about emphasizing our strengths rather than our weaknesses. What we do right versus what we do wrong.
Focusing forward improves our problem solving capabilities.
Focusing forward makes us less defensive and more accountable. We are more likely to look in the mirror than look for someone else to blame.
Yes! We have the choice to make a difference in the world. All it takes is to be a player, take risks and focus forward.
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